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19 years it's been. I remember our wedding day. The minister was a real piece of work. She told me that Mark and I wouldn't last 6 months. It's been 19 years since that day and two years after that day, her congregation took a vote and asked her to leave. Funny how things work out.
I remember the strange ways Mom tried to control that last day, making me go check the reception hall when I should have been doing my hair. And then me showing up nearly late, totally disheveled and having to throw my makeup on as fast as I could. As a contrast, my bridesmaids had been to the hair-dresser.
But, other than the minister who pretty much shouted out the vows to us (I wans't allowed II Corinthians because I wasn't religious enough, @@) the wedding was beautiful. It was one of the last important events I would experience there. And I still remember clutching Mark's hand hard and him clutching back equally hard. We haven't understood each other very much at times. In fact, these days our interests are pretty much different from each other. But he's the guy who was there for me after Dad died. And he supports me whenever anyone might cause me trouble. He once asked me if I needed him to have a talk with a manager (the answer was no).
As much as there have been problems these past few years, there's all the ways we are there for each other. And I know he loves me, just like I love him. It's hard to reconcile the changes we gone through, sometimes. And I just don't know what to do/think about that.
And no, I'm not in that bad place I was when I wrote that cryptic and (I'm sure) rather distressing post from a month ago! I'm just thinking. Tonight is actually a good night. :)
I remember the strange ways Mom tried to control that last day, making me go check the reception hall when I should have been doing my hair. And then me showing up nearly late, totally disheveled and having to throw my makeup on as fast as I could. As a contrast, my bridesmaids had been to the hair-dresser.
But, other than the minister who pretty much shouted out the vows to us (I wans't allowed II Corinthians because I wasn't religious enough, @@) the wedding was beautiful. It was one of the last important events I would experience there. And I still remember clutching Mark's hand hard and him clutching back equally hard. We haven't understood each other very much at times. In fact, these days our interests are pretty much different from each other. But he's the guy who was there for me after Dad died. And he supports me whenever anyone might cause me trouble. He once asked me if I needed him to have a talk with a manager (the answer was no).
As much as there have been problems these past few years, there's all the ways we are there for each other. And I know he loves me, just like I love him. It's hard to reconcile the changes we gone through, sometimes. And I just don't know what to do/think about that.
And no, I'm not in that bad place I was when I wrote that cryptic and (I'm sure) rather distressing post from a month ago! I'm just thinking. Tonight is actually a good night. :)
